I am currently participating in 16 extracurriculars to make my transcript look golden. However, in order to really make myself look unique (because my best friend has 17 extracurriculars), I’ve put myself on hunger strike for the past few months because I believe it will make for a great essay. Unfortunately, one of my classmates has one upped me and amputated an arm and donated a kidney to a third world country. How can I really show my privilege, and total perfection, to the top 10 universities in the world?

Honestly you’re screwed. Your only hope may be to shave your head and stop wearing clothes to protest traditional gender role clothing. That worked for me. #Harvard2021

well hello there I need help on what to wear on a date! lol plz help 😉 😉

This is so broad. I need to know what kind of date, where you’re going, what the person is like. Please ask again with more specifics so I can be of more assistance. But always look cute. You probably knew that though. It’s okay this whole column is a learning process. Talk more later!?

I need a prom date but I don’t like anyone enough to put effort into trying to go with someone.

Oh prom. The age-old dilemma. I feel like you just summed up how most people feel about the boring dance in which no one dances. The best route to go is probably taking a (maybe/probably/ideally cute) friend in this situation. It’s low pressure, and fun. if you are choosing to go with the opposite sex, then maybe when hanging out in a group mention “Ugh guys I don’t know what I’m going to do about prom.” If they’re in the same boat as you, they will definitely get the hint. With this situation though I really recommend being straightforward.

In twenty years it won’t matter that you brought up going to prom together. Just casually mention it. Strike a deal. “We should go together if we don’t have things with anyone.” Totally cool, totally chill. Or if you’re super desperate then you can always hook up with someone in the same boat as you at the next party. That should secure you a date too, but only do that if you really like them/are kind of interested. Don’t think about it too much though, someone is always thinkin’ about ya.


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